The Case of The Insecurities

It’s morning time. You wake up, stretch, proclaim that this day is good and start the routine. There may be a few mouths to feed, a diaper to change or a husband to hit upside the head (with a pillow), to get the gears of the house turning. Eventually you make your way into the bathroom, and if there’s a mirror in it, you catch a glance and say….well, what do you say? Or what do you think?

One criticizing look at ourselves and quickly our attitude’s reflect ungratefulness, shame, discontent and insecurity. With unspoken words, I’ll go through various body parts and tell  them what they need: the butt needs more squats, the “girls” need more push ups (or a bra?)…and so on. We all do it. We analyze our reflection and then inflict punishment by diet and exercise. IMG_8099

Is this what the relationship between health and our bodies is supposed to be? I swear, this is the same thing as using pruning shears to give yourself a hair cut. Exercise and diet have a different purpose than punishment, they serve us much better as a means to take care of ourselves rather than punishment and shame-slaying.

I’m here to tell you to stop. When our mind so roughly analyzes our physical form, it QUIETS the Spirit of God. It is utterly unacceptable to Him and completely destructive to our spirits.

“Always be joyful.  Never stop praying. Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus. Do not stifle the Holy Spirit.” 1 Thessalonians 5:16-19

Our thoughts of insecurity dampen the noise of GRACE that could be BOOMING through us. I’m ugly, I need to cut back, I’m gaining, I need to lose 10 inches….all this thinking may push us to join a program or begin a healthy lifestyle, sure. But when health and physical prowess come from a place of discontent and self-resentment, it only leads to another thing to be unhappy about.

It is normal to feel this way. Every woman (and man) goes through this, but we need to take our insecurities by the shirt collar and face them like the women we are. We are so much more than our flabby skin and wrinkled chins. We will never find 100% health, happiness and security until we understand the true purpose of our body, mind and soul.

Ok, so  now what do we do with this body of ours?! I’ve birthed two (HUGE) babies, got some kind of GI issues going on, and I’m no spring chicken! Is there hope? With great guilt and depression, I’ve worn the labels of Unmotivated, Insecure and Lack of direction and those are not pleasant places to be in. Girlfriends, if you want to truly understand what your body was made for, look no further than the one who created it. If we want to feel SECURE in our bodies and minds, we need to learn to be with the one who give us definition and life!

“Let your roots grow down into Him [God], and let your lives be built on him. Then your faith will grow strong in the truth you were taught, and you will overflow with thankfulness.” Colossians 2:7

Our God commands us to be still, to simply rest and be with Him. Read His Word, write it out, meditate. This is where our roots grow deep and where His work begins in us. If God is our #1, life will look a lot different than body shaming, number counting and roller coaster diets. It will be one full of strength, laughter and direction. A life of security in God rather than our appearance is: restful, passionate, purposeful, content, and you’ll finally get “it”. God will begin to show you what to do with your body; what your body, mind and soul were meant to do as a whole. He will unearth passions and talents that maybe you have forgotten were there. He will show you that you can trust Him. He will replace your fears with hope knowing your weakness binds you to God. A life of just getting by will become one with life-changing impact on you and those around you. By embracing imperfections AND strength you will become a woman of valor. Through physical, emotional and relational battles, a dependence on God will make you strong to the soul. True confidence in the self is God-confidence.

“The [woman] who trusts in the Lord will be blessed. The Lord will show [her] that He can be trusted.” Jeremiah 17:7

On average, our health and fitness journey’s begin with resentment of who we are, what we look like and a severe case of the insecurities. Our health needs to come from a place that is ALREADY confident and secure. God wants to do a DEEP work in you. The definition of perfection and beauty is truly how God sees us. He sees us as DAUGHTERS, BEAUTY, more than CONQUERORS, a women of WORTH, His TEMPLES,  FRIENDS, and His WORKMANSHIPS.

“She is clothed in strength & dignity and she laughs without fear of the future.” Proverbs 31:25IMG_9298

Next time you miss a workout or gain a pound, feel no guilt or depression because God fuels you and HE defines you. What you do and how you feel does NOT. You are complete body, mind and soul and confident by the Spirit of God IN YOU.

If a health journey comes from a place where our looks are of concern, then it ends there too. From shameful reflections to prideful ones, it easily becomes all about our physical appearance when we all know that we are much more than that.

“Your beauty should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle & quiet spirit. Which is of great worth in God’s sight.” 1 Peter 3:4

The first step in living a healthy lifestyle is contemplation. I want to hear from YOU! What are you contemplating doing with your health? Are you going through some of the things I described in this blog post? Don’t be afraid to reach out. This is a together thing.

#befearless #godconfidence


Bri joy




  1. Deb says:

    Thanks Bri!
    It’s interesting, in that at my age (59) it is not issues of our outer bodies that become the focus. It’s our inner function that is failing us. Ha! We are at the age of early onset arthritis, high blood pressure, disc problems, etc. Many of us have hidden issues that also hinder our workouts. To those of you out there- you are not alone! Ya gotta just MOVE.
    Thanks Bri for the encouragement!
    Folks, God loves you no matter where you are in life. Let HIM be your source. All strength comes from Him.


    1. Bri Joy says:

      That is something to think about, wow, thanks for speaking up! There is a battle no matter what stage in life we are at. There are a few women in that category–cancer, rheumatoid arthritis, and so on, that are in a couple of the classes I instruct and it’s so empowering to see them show up and do all of what they can with no shame that they’ll need to modify! They know that they do need to move their bodies in order to take care of what God gave us. I think I have an idea of what will come next week on the blog… 🙂


  2. Sam says:

    I have been struggling for months with getting fit again. I think I spent some time in disbelief that this happened. I might weigh more than I ever have in my life…not sure. I feel uncomfortable in my body and some of my clothes. I have gone through the self-hate or negative self-talk and I’m on the other side of it. I think about exercising now and sometimes I’m too tired (because I’m too busy) and sometimes I think about how I’d love to but it would be too hard, too difficult. I can barely motivate myself to do it alone. I look at gym class schedules and I can’t attend them because I’m working, etc., though I’m much more likely to go to them than workout at home alone. I just talked to an old friend/acquaintance and thought that we were going to be BBG partners but she stopped writing me back. I almost feel complacent about it because I couldn’t keep being mad at myself and at the random injuries I got while trying to get back into shape this Spring. Yikes. How do I get started and not give up when the next week looks busier?

    Your post was right on and had things I needed to hear. I don’t want to come at my fitness from a perspective that’s all about my looks. I want to begin where I began in the past. How did my mind get to this place that is clouding my real value or healthier, old perspectives?

    Thanks for what you do, Bri. You are a wise friend. 🙂


    1. Bri Joy says:

      Aw, Sam! Thanks for sharing where you are at. Our real value gets clouded when our hearts eyes are set on only our body! As I write each blog, I’m learning and trying to understand it for myself too, because this has been a huge road block for me at times too. I’m understanding now all of what I am and that has helped my attitude/approach immensely! Our bodies have the ability to do, to play out our calling, to express the dreams & desires of the soul, and reflect the connection our spirit has with God’s!!! That’s what it’s all about. 🙂 Love you girl!


  3. Stacy says:

    Great message again Bri, thank you for the time you out into every one! As an “elder” myself at 49 and going thru menopause I find myself battling many of the things you described differently. We do not recover from injury quite as fast as we used to, our brains & bodies do not do what we once could BUT, we can be strong and we can enjoy every day to its fullest – it’s just a new normal. :).
    I am learning to rest when my body needs it and just lean into Him! Find a quiet cozy spot (I fixed up my front porch) and give yourself time to just be still. God will cover your day and your to do’s when you give him your life!!


    1. Bri Joy says:

      Oh, what a powerful statement! Thanks for sharing that Stacc!!! Your body moves and works and expresses what’s going on in the your soul desires and your spirit’s connection with God! He gave you a body that has the ability to do what He has called it to do. If that means taking a step back to focus on less-physically taxing actives, then so be it!!! You will experience that new attitude towards yourself and a new joy!


  4. Annie Lowery says:

    Hi great readding your post


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